Beloit College, just across the Wisconsin line and just outside the Chicago area, puts together a list every year to describe the incoming class of first-years. Last year's list made me cry. This year's list provoked a different emotion, one that I can't quite make out with my age-addled brain:
2. Ferris Bueller and Sloane Peterson could be their parents.
12. Amazon has never been just a river in South America.
22. John Wayne Bobbitt has always slept with one eye open.
39. Moderate amounts of red wine and baby aspirin have always been thought good for the heart.
60. Frasier, Sam, Woody and Rebecca have never Cheerfully frequented a bar in Boston during primetime.
75. The New York Times and the Boston Globe have never been rival newspapers.
OK, time for my Geritol...