A guy is at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted, while St. Peter
is leafing through this Big Book to see if the guy is worthy of entering.
Saint Peter goes through the books several times, furrows his brow, and
says to the guy, "You know, I can't see that you did anything really good in
your life but, you never did anything bad either. Tell you what, if you can
tell me of one REALLY good deed that you did in your life, you're in."
The guy thinks for a moment and says, "Yeah, there was this one time when
I was driving down the highway and I saw a giant group of KKK Biker Gang
Rapists assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down my car to see what was going
on, and sure enough, there they were, about 50 of them torturing this girl.
"Infuriated, I get out my car, grabbed a tire iron out of my trunk, and
walked straight up to the leader of the gang, a huge guy with a studded leather
jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear.
"As I walked up to the leader, the KKK Biker Gang Rapists formed a circle
around me. So, I rip the leader's chain off his face and smash him over the head
with the tire iron. Then I turn around and yell to the rest of them, 'Leave this
poor, innocent girl alone! You're all a bunch of sick, deranged animals! Go home
before I teach you all a lesson in pain!'"
St. Peter, impressed, says "Really? When did this happen?"
"Oh, about two minutes ago."
Submitted by reader J.S.